What to Expect in Your First Grief Counseling Session in Boston
Starting grief counseling can bring up mixed emotions. You might feel nervous, hopeful, or unsure about what to expect. The desire for your grief to be acknowledged is powerful, but stepping into a therapy session with a new therapist can significantly amplify that feeling of vulnerability. Part of the therapeutic process is developing a feeling of safety with your therapist; this starts in the first session but can take some time.
Grief is already such a tender process, and taking the first step toward talking about it is an act of courage. In my earlier post, The Complete Guide to Finding the Right Therapist, Psychologist, or Counselor in Boston, I shared how to find the right therapist for your needs. This article focuses on what happens next; your very first grief counseling session; so you can arrive feeling more grounded and prepared. This
Before You Arrive
Before your first session, you’ll receive intake paperwork that helps me get to know you. It covers basic background information, what’s bringing you to counseling, and a few policies that protect your privacy and outline how our sessions work. I’ll provide a secure telehealth link and a few tips to make the space feel comfortable and private.
Some clients find it helpful to take a quiet moment before their appointment; maybe a short walk, a few deep breaths, or jotting down a few thoughts about what they hope to share. Although, some of you are living full lives and it’s a miracle that you made time in your schedule for it! Essentially, come as you are and don’t worry too much. It’s my job to help set the pace, tone and container for our time together.
The First 10 Minutes
We’ll begin by reviewing your paperwork together. This includes informed consent, which explains confidentiality, your rights as a client, and what you can expect from me as your therapist. I’ll also answer any questions you might have.
These early minutes are designed to help you feel safe, supported, and in control of your own process. Therapy begins with clarity and consent, not pressure or expectation.
The Heart of the First Session
Most of the session is spent talking about what has brought you to grief counseling. Grief is nonlinear and there is no one right place to start inside the story of your loss. You might share about a recent loss, a past death that still feels close, or a non-death loss such as a transition, relationship change, or health diagnosis.
Many clients are surprised when I ask what they hope to gain from therapy right from the beginning. You don’t need a polished answer. This question helps us begin to shape the direction of your care.
We’ll talk about what grief has looked like for you so far: emotions, physical sensations, changes in sleep or appetite or existential concerns. We will begin to identify your grief symptoms ; learning how grief is manifesting within your experience is empowering. You can share as much or as little as feels right. My role is to listen, notice patterns, and begin to understand the unique fingerprint of your grief.
This first meeting is less about “doing therapy” and more about building trust. It’s the foundation that allows you to explore safely in the weeks ahead.
Ending the Session
As our time wraps up, I’ll summarize what we’ve discussed and share thoughts on what next steps might look like. We’ll decide together how often to meet and what our initial focus will be. Some clients prefer weekly sessions at first; others find a bi-weekly rhythm works best.
Common Feelings After Session One
After your first session, you might feel a mix of emotions; relief, fatigue, sadness, or even uncertainty. Therapy opens a space for emotions that may have been quiet or hidden for a while. It’s common to feel tender afterward. It’s safe to assume that you are tired; grief is exhausting and most people I meet with are recovering from intensive care-giving and the on-going depletion of the grief process.
Some people describe their first grief counseling session as a deep exhale, finally being able to speak freely about their loss. Others feel a heaviness as they begin to face what’s been avoided. Every reaction is valid. Be gentle with yourself afterward: take a walk, have a cup of tea, rest, binge Netflix or write about what surfaced. Healing begins in these small, honest moments.
Taking the First Step
Beginning grief counseling means choosing to care for your loss rather than carry it alone. The first session is simply an opening; a chance to be witnessed, heard, and supported as you navigate what’s next.
If you’re considering grief counseling with me, I’d be honored to meet you. Together, we can explore your grief with curiosity and compassion, helping you find steadier ground as you integrate what this loss means for you.
